[Voice]

[napoleonicrat]

Quaint little city, isn't it? If only they hadn't been so rude about my... accommodations. But what's past is past. I must say the locals are a joy in themselves, busy like little worker ants. 

Enough about them. I'm a sociable man, so let's do the best to make light out of our unfortunate situation and socialize. Go on, do tell me about your minuscule lives--a name, anything. I'm dying to know. 

Or maybe you'd like to discuss holidays. Christmas will arrive any moment, you know. Any plans? I know have one or two of my own...

[Chuckles.]

Comments

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Did you say ants? Where did you find ants?

[napoleonicrat]

They're an analogy. Try not to take them too literally.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Now he tells me.

[napoleonicrat]

I can't be accountable for a fault in communication.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Could you at least explain who Christmas is? What's so important them? Are they a friend of yours or something?

[napoleonicrat]

You really don't know Christmas!

[Bursts into laughter.]

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

... What?

[napoleonicrat]

[Deep, calming breath.]

Nothing, nothing.

I simply find it amusing.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Let me guess, they're some big shot where you're from, right?

[napoleonicrat]

[Chuckles.]

In a way, yes.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Great. As if we didn't have enough of those.

[napoleonicrat]

More holidays? How novel.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Holidays?

[napoleonicrat]

Yes, Christmas is a holiday.

[Deadpan.]

Stunning, isn't it?

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

... And what do you have planned for this 'holiday'?

[napoleonicrat]

Gift giving, of course!

I'm a generous soul.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Really? Just, uh, what did you have in mind?

[napoleonicrat]

Any preferences?

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

The list could go on but I'd prefer something appetizing, personally. Or diamonds. Emeralds and ruby's... You know, something expensive!

Actually, now that I think of it seein' a few folks 'round here a lot less would be a good gift too.

[napoleonicrat]

Oh, so you want protection! That might be arranged...depending on the clientele.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

Protection? No! I have- I can take care of myself.

[napoleonicrat]

Oh, I see...you want someone 'gone'.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

More like someones. Emphases on the s.

[napoleonicrat]

Names would be most beneficial.

[cowardly-hero.livejournal.com]

I ain't about to make a hit list.